My Silver Crown March 16, 2012

In 1977 around the time of Queen Elizabeth’s Silver Jubilee my maternal grandparents bought me a silver necklace.  On the necklace was a little silver charm in the style of St Edward’s crown.  It was pretty and I loved it.

I remember one day it fell behind my chest of drawers.  I pulled and tugged at the heavy piece of furniture until it moved just enough for me to slip my hand behind and retrieve it.  In doing I managed to get it caught and the cross on top of the crown that helped form the bale got bent.  It upset me but at least it wasn’t broken.  I was given that necklace 35 years ago.  Somewhere in those years it got lost but I’ve never forgotten it and think about it often.

I have a charm bracelet, silver of course, and when major events happen in my life, I add a charm to mark the occasion.  I am also given charms as gifts and these serve to remind me of the important people in my life who give them to me.  Each one is as important to me as that little crown I loved and lost years ago.

This year marks the 60th year since Queen Elizabeth came to the throne and I thought it would be nice to add a crown to my charm bracelet as a marker for this national event and as a little nod to the one my Grandparents gave me.  Ebay is my usual port of call for these types of things (most things actually) so I had a browse.

I found a charm that completely matched my memory of my little crown.  I was thrilled and bought it.  Today it arrived and imagine how I felt when, not only was it exactly like my old one but, the cross on top was bent!

A New Day Begins March 6, 2012

  I rose from my bed (ok clearly not my bed, my sofa) this morning feeling quite positive.  By the end of each day I am so tired that it’s all I can do to drag myself to bed and as you can see from the picture, last night it didn’t happen.  For the last couple of days I’ve been doing some ‘proper’ exercise on top of the dog walking I do for a living and the fortnightly riding lessons and I am feeling it. So having woken up feeling achy but otherwise well I am now planning my day.  I’m not sure how many of you do this. I guess for most people it’s a simple matter of getting up, going to work, coming home, then doing what needs doing, but I have always planned. So my plan for today:

1. Take medicine – check
2. Have something to eat with second hot drink of the day – check
3. Get bathed and dressed
4. First paid job of the day
5. Second job cancelled so go to town.  Pay in cheques.  Go to book shop
6. Third paid job
7. Fourth paid job
8. Fifth paid job
9. Home for car windscreen replaced
10. Possible 6th job?  Confirm this
11. Make dinner
12. Tidy up
13. Visit Father in Law
14. Make jewellery – have designed earrings I want to make
15. Husband home?
16. Write some poetry
17. Go to BED

How much of this from no 11 onwards actually happens is anyone’s guess but that’s the plan.  The least enjoyable part of the day is visiting my Father in Law, but that is also the task that will lead to the most amount of guilt if I don’t do it.  How apt that it comes in at No 13!

And today’s ultimate challenge?  No. 17 – To make it to bed

Husband (haiku) February 23, 2012

Husband, you are the

Missing part of me I did

Not know wasn’t there

A lovely day out February 14, 2012

It’s half term, so I wanted to spend at least one day this week with the kids.  Better still, my husband was able to get the day off too so we had an entire day together as a family.  That’s a rare treat.

Last year I had managed to get some vouchers giving us free entry into the Tower of London.  Having spent many years living on the edges of and working in London there are a lot of the sights and landmarks we haven’t seen.  Husband and I have both been (separately) to the Tower so thought it would be an interesting place to go as a family.

Luckily husband works around the corner and we were able to park there and finish our journey on foot.  I say luckily because the train fare would have been in the region of £70 return.

It was surprisingly busy for a February morning but there was lots to see and we all enjoyed it.  There are still bits there we haven’t seen, but as I say it was busy and very chilly too.  I don’t mind as it’s reason to go back

We had a late lunch in The Breakfast Club in Spitalfields.  It’s my new favourite place.  The decor is ‘Nouveau Retro’ and shabby chic.  The food, unsurprisingly, is all day breakfasts and burgers and was a smash hit with my children.  The background music was a fantastic blend of 60′s soul, and 80′s pop with a few other classics thrown in for good measure.  The clientele was a fabulous mix of city suits and arty types.  I could have happily moved in there!

So photos:  A few from the Tower, which my Daughter still insists is NOT a tower, and a few from The Breakfast Club.  The picture at the top of the post is the signage above the restaurant and, do you know what?  Today was a good day.

Good things….. February 12, 2012

Aaaaaaaargh!

Do I have your attention?  Good! Because I feel like I’m teetering on the edge of a great pool of despair and I’m about to fall in.

It’s been such a busy week and I am tired.  Being tired always makes me so grumpy.  I also know that a ‘friend’ wants to ‘talk’ to me and you know that any talk in inverted commas is never a good talk.   Today, for the first time in a couple of days I’ll be seeing my (senile) Father in Law (http://thedementiadiary.wordpress.com/), which because I am tired will be a struggle.  I have to keep patient. We’re taking him to my Mum’s which should help; A problem shared and all that!

 

So I’m looking now for a couple of positives to see me through the day and I’ve come up with a couple.

The first is dinner cooked by my mum.  I don’t think there’s many people in the world who don’t love their mum’s cooking (except my kids who have weird eating habits but that’s another story) and I am no exception.

The other is this post that I’ve just found http://chittlechattle.wordpress.com/a-collage-a-day/

It’s half term so the kids are at home.  My work is reduced during the holidays so I’ll be looking for creative ideas to share and do with my children, and this really inspired me.  I’m looking forward to doing some similar things.

Right off I go now into the day………..

The good moments…. February 9, 2012

By the end of yesterday I was feeling exhausted and down so I’m glad that I took a few pictures to remind me of some of the good points.

Yesterday was kind of a long day for me.  I started work at 9.30 (my job is technically part time but I’m self employed) and went through to 4.15, then dashed into town to meet my kids at the opticians.  I dropped them at home, had a quick tidy round and as husband got in I went to meet a new client.  From there it was time to visit my F i L (The Dementia Diary), then the supermarket to buy something for dinner, and finally at 9.30 I was home.

Snow with some relish February 5, 2012

I’ve been on a bit of a downer for the last few days.  Not surprising when you consider that I’ve travelled hundreds of miles (500 plus?), been to a family funeral, been cooped up with F i L, it’s freezing cold and there’s been some really dumb things done in the name of my business (and not by me).

Today I’ve woken up with a migraine, which 10 hours later I still have, but overall I am feeling more positive.  Customers I thought may have lost have called up so it looks like I’ll be having a busy week. That has cheered me up.

But what has really made me feel better is the snow.

It’s crisp, so white, so clean and perfect, especially first thing in the morning and that clean perfection gives us the perfect clean slate.  A new start.

My dog hasn’t seen snow before.  He was so excited by it, trying to eat it, playing in it.  He stayed out in it for ages, until he was so cold and covered in ice he was shaking from head to toe. He was relishing it and that’s something I need to learn to do – relish the moment.

How my day looks……….. February 2, 2012

I’ve been up for 2.5 hours and I’m still not dressed.  I’m trying to put off the day because I’m really not looking forward to the end of it.  I’ve got 5 dogs to walk, which is a quiet day, but it’s bitterly cold out.  I don’t mind that; as Ranulph Fiennes said

“There’s no such thing as bad weather, only inappropriate clothing”Once I’ve walked the dogs I have to go to Yorkshire for a funeral and I’ll be trapped in a car with my senile Father in Law for 7 hours (wordpress.com/The Dementia Diary)

That’s made worse by knowing that tomorrow morning we have to get him ready, to a deadline, for a funeral, take him to three separate venues for the various events and then have that huge drive home again.

What Joy!

Here’s a thought… February 1, 2012

Here’s a thought……

If someone is stressed or depressed and you keep emailing them, calling them, messaging them saying

“What’s wrong?”

“Are you OK?”

“What have I done?”

YOU ARE NOT HELPING THEM!

Why?

Because what you are saying to them is really….

I have an emotional need to know what is happening

It’s not really about the depressed person is it?

You’re putting the added burden of being responsible for YOUR emotional welfare on a person who is already struggling with their own.

In future try this….

“You’re having a difficult time.  I’m here whenever and however you need me”

aaaah!  That’s better

Choosing my words………. January 30, 2012

There’s a lot of things I’d like to get off my chest, but I’m very aware that  putting something down in writing somehow makes it permanent and un-erasable in history.

Instead, today, because I am choosing my words carefully I will take this time to say how proud I am of my children.

My role, as I see it, as a parent is to raise confident, compassionate, level-headed human beings capable of functioning in an evermore complicated world.  Both of my children have had trying weeks (daughter slightly more so with the terrible death of a fellow student at her school on top of a family death and another by association).

Every evening husband and I leave them to visit Senile Father in Law (http://thedementiadiary.wordpress.com/)

They never complain. They never whine. They don’t ask for more than we can give.

They do their chores.  They do their homework.  They get themselves up dressed and ready for school.  They share their worries with us and they listen to ours.

My children are amazing.